I'm Just Trying To Help (Me Like You)

I called you up to let you know

some things that I've learned since I let you go

well for one you're much better than her

yes it's true

but if you want me to come back to you

here's a list of some things

that you could choose to do

there's one thing about her I adore

yeah her stomach is flatter than yours

and don't you get an attitude

since when is honesty being rude?

at the end of the day I'm just trying to help

me like you

like before, when we'd go out

and I'd block the cake you could do without

I can't let you weigh more than 100 pounds

but if you want me to come back to you

here's a list of some things

that you could choose to do

like learn to pick up for your man

and have you considered a spray-on tan?

I kind of want to be with you

as long as you change a thing or two

I recognize you're kind of cool

I might even try to be true to you

just take this time to exercise

focus on slimming those pearly thighs

if you do that it'd be the bomb

and you'd look a little less like your mom

I saw you out the other day

with your new guy did he choose to pay

for your meal? I would never do that

but if you want me to come back to you

here's a list of some things

that you should choose to do

like maybe get rid of your man

'cuz how can he treat you as well as I can?

I kind of want to be with you

as long as you change a thing or two

I recognize you're sorta cool

I might even try to be true to you

just take this time to exercise

focus on slimming those pearly thighs

if you do that it'd be the bomb

and you'd look a little less like your mom