Page type: lyric reference
Artist: The Singing Loins
Canonical path: /the-singing-loins/please-take-my-scissors-away
Related lyric paths: 6
Video embedded: yes
Lyric guide
Please Take My Scissors Away
Read Please Take My Scissors Away lyrics by The Singing Loins on LyroVerse, with linked artist context and related song paths.
person
Curated by Ethan Walker
LyroVerse team
Reference snapshot
The page facts to cite before the commentary
Use this page for the lyric text, linked artist context, and any LyroVerse editor's note attached to the song. Listener comments remain user-generated and should not be treated as the primary source.
Lyrics
Please Take My Scissors Away
The lyric stays readable and compact here; the note and related paths sit nearby so you do not lose the song while looking for context.
May I cut your silhouette, Sir?
Immortalise your bust, Madam?
May I render your luverly children in black?
And, if they're a bit fidgety, give them a smack?
I'm so lately ill at ease.
Oh, Officer please, Officer please
There will be hell to pay
If you don't take…
Officer please
…Take my scissors away.
For years and years and donkey's years
I've practised here, here on the pier.
Superior portraits in shadow, with feeling,
But no-one now wants their physiognomy revealing.
Anyone would think I had a vile disease
Oh, Officer please, Officer please
There will be hell to pay
If you don't take…
Officer please
…Take my scissors away.
It's the fault of the photographers, yes,
Those pornographers, damn them! So crass.
"Are you watching the dickie-bird? Say - Cheese!" And SNAP!
Where's the bloody, fucking skill in that?
I'm so lately ill at ease.
Oh, Officer please, Officer please
There will be hell to pay
If you don't take…
Officer please
…Take my scissors away.
Please take my scissors away…
Away… Away… Away…
Please take my scissors away…
Away… Away… Away…
Take them away….
Take me away…
Away… Away… Away…
Quick answers
What this page can answer fast
Who performs "Please Take My Scissors Away"?
The Singing Loins performs "Please Take My Scissors Away", and this lyric page sits inside the The Singing Loins catalog on LyroVerse.
Are there related songs to explore after "Please Take My Scissors Away"?
Yes. The related section below points to Angel Of The Medway and A House In The Woods with a short reason for opening each page next.
Where can I find more songs by The Singing Loins?
Use the artist link near the top of the page or the related paths section below to keep moving through The Singing Loins's lyric pages.
Song Room
Open Song Room
Interpretations, questions, and corrections for this song
Interpretations, questions, memories, and correction notes live together here. The room stays noindex while the best insights are reviewed.
Listener comments
What people are saying
No listener comments on Please Take My Scissors Away yet.
A strong comment here is specific: the phrase you keep hearing, the mood you come back for, or the reason this song stays in rotation.
Sign in to post the first listener note. Reporting stays open to everyone.