Facelift

Last night,

I crawled out back of my bedroom window and I felt my neck crack,

So I let all my sins go to hell

And I kept on running like the wind blows.

I ran into a girl who had no face, just a large hole.

She said the snowman she had made tore out her brain and took her soul.

She said her parents wouldn't have her and she couldn't go to school,

Because the children filled her skull with Black and Decker power tools.

So, I ran into a factory where frowns were being built.

I turned the machines upside-down and made a smile for the girl.

I handed it to her and she kissed me on the cheek.

My face was stained with blood for the remainder of the week.

She told me that she loved me,

So I got down on one knee.

We were married the next day in the smile factory.

All the workers started crying tears of joy and tears of gladness,

Then we all exchanged high fives as we rode into the sunset.