Australia - The World's Suburb

Maybe it makes you more intense

When your county's small and you live in tents;

Kurds get gas and die to win

Land from Yass to Deniliquin.

Israel is the merest sliver,

Fits between Hay and the Murray River;

My map don't show Condamine,

But it's probably bigger than Palastine.

Imagine if old Yassa Arafat

Was given everything east of Ararat?

Make the middle east far less hairy,

And none of us would miss Port Fairy.

Let's solve the whole Arabic mania,

Let's sling 'em - what's it called? - Tasmania.

Put all of Israel east of Broome -

Double the size! We've got the room:

But nationalism's so damned myopic

When you're on the atlas but microscopic -

All those guys would rather blow it up

Than move their home to Kooweerup.

Of all nations, the most superb -

Australia, the world's suburb.

chorus:

Aussie Aussie Aussie!

oi! oi! oi! (repeat ad nauseum)