You And I Both Lose (But 5 Wins)

Ok but this is the last thing

I said to my good friend

If this bombs man, if this time it doesn’t fly

I’m throwing the towel in. I tire of these welts from

Banging my head against the wall

And with that (quite startled) I saw her trespassing

Her hands were deep within my bin out on the curb

Excuse me, but what are

My words interrupted

(As) she pierced her gaze into my eyes

You seem like a good boy

She reached in her pocket

You look like you could hold your own and last a game!

She just started giggling, quite uncontrollably

Pulled up a chair! Tied back her hair! With not a care, whipped out a deck of cards

Opened the box, I looked at my watch, she pulled up her socks and

Dealt a hand of 5 (1,2,3,4,5)

I tried to explain that I had to be somewhere

She pressed her finger to my lips and shooshed me down

“Just sit in your chair there, you're right where you should be

You got no better place to go! Now

The rules of the game, she continued, are simple

Regardless of your card, the number, or its suit

You place it on top of the pile in the centre

And simply say the number 5

She seemed unconcerned with the turn of my eyebrow

And pushed me down the second I tried to get up

And that was the point I lost my sense of humour

So, what, that’s it?

You’re full of shit!

She didn't quit, no, it's like she didn't hear

So! Now you know the way it goes, let's play and... Oh!

So here's the final rule

You and I both lose, but 5 wins!

You've got to be joking?, I said, fully puzzled

That's easily the dumbest card game of all time

So, what, we just sit here, and stack up our hands, and

No matter what, we call a 5?

She then scratched her finger up hard on her jawbone

And said: Look man, it isn't me that makes the rules

I'm merely concerned with the teaching, the playing

The execution of the game

We sat on my front deck, what must have been for hours

Just emptying hand after hand of all our cards

At some point she left, but I really can't remember

Back to the game. Devote my brain, but it ends the same, no matter what I do

My patience thin, my manic grin, I'll never win - no, 5 will. Every time

You and I both lose, but 5 wins

It's been such a long time, since I've seen that lady

(This all happened back in two thousand and five)

Try as I might to resist the temptation

I'll still pick up this deck of cards

And though she is gone now, I'll always remember

The day she taught me of this blasted waste of time

But the thing is, dear,listener, I can't stop from playing

Along she came, without a name, and a stupid game

Impossible, and still

Just one more time!

I'll turn to find

Maybe this time, arghh I can beat the 5!

No

You and I both lose, but 5 wins