The Girlie Had a Mustache

(Get down)

I was cruisin down the avenue early one Friday

When I saw what I thought was a lady walkin my way

I turned my back to mama can I blast

And I said hmm excuse me and she walked past

She was about five foot six or maybe six and a half

With a body like a goddess, man, this girl was bad!

Tight leather pants that fit like a drum

And two big - yeah well, she had some

Anyway from behind she was fine

But when she turned around, her mustache was bigger than mine

At first I laughed, cause yo, to me that was funny

But the laughter ceased when she said hey honey

At first I was confused, I was somewhat spell-bound

My mouth wide open and my chin on the ground

And then it hit me, like a bolt from the sky

I thought: hold up - wait - this girl is a guy

I tried to get away, I said, Well, never mind

Maybe I'll see you some other time

But then he grabbed me by my arm and told me I couldn't leave

And said, Hey boy, you look mighty cute in them jeans

This had to be the most embarrassing thing in the world

My whole neighbourhood was watching me get beat up by a girl

And when my homeboys came, they didn't let me explain

They said prince, you're a sucker, you should be ashamed

My pride was busted right along with my eye

Cause my homeboys didn't realize that this girl was a guy

And in retrospect I had to laugh

I can't believe I didn't notice that this girlie had a mustache

(get down)

I remember last year, the day was October 5th

And my family went away on a weekend ski trip

And they left $100 and a note by the phone

That said don't have any company till we get home

No company I'm 18 They must be jokin!

And by 10 my crib was smokin

All of my friends with their hands in the air

Screaming (party over here party over there)

The party was jammin till at least about 5

And as my friends were leaving, they were like Homes, it was

live

I thought the party was over, but really was just beginning

I turned around I thought I was dreamin, I saw four women

Dressed in red leather, tight to their booties

I gestured with my index finger come here, cuties

I tried to be chill, I didn't wanna scare em

I said Hi my name's the Prince they said Hi Prince, wheres your

harem

I didn't waste time, I started shooting the gift

I said Y'all the type of girls I'd like to spend some time with

I walked upstair, my adrenaline pumpin

Till one hit me in the head with a lamp or somethin

The next thing I remember is wakin up nearly dead

With another Fred Flintstone lump on my head

Of course I was mad, this type of thing can burn at you

They tied me up and they were stealin my furniture

I said Yo sweetheart, what's wrong with you

What kind of stuff is this for a nice girl like you to do?"

She turned around and smiled and laughed

And that's the way that I noticed that the girlie had a mustache

Not four girls, four guys

They were in disguise it was a set up all the time

I made a complete fool of myself that day

My parents were pullin up just as the u-haul truck was pullin

away

They walked in, looked like they seen a ghost

There I was, gagged and bound and tied to the bed post

My pop walked in and asked a brilliant question

Son, where's the furniture and why is your room so messy

Obviously Sherlock Holmes had been arrived

I said What do you think, dad, maybe we were robbed

I'm tied up, nothing's in one piece

Let's discuss the facts later, mom, please call the police

I wanted to have a party, I thought I was clever

My pop told me I was on punishment forever!

And in retrospect I had to laugh

I can't believe I didn't notice that the girlie had a mustache

(get down)