Who Stole My Car

Yo jeff whats up holmes

Yo Whats up prince

Yo whats up man

Ay wheres my car at

Wheres your car why you asking me

No I parked my car right here your standing here wheres my car

I been ere for an hour and a half I ain't seen it

Come on man stop playing jeff wheres my car at

No I'm serious man it's not in my pocket I haven't seen your car

Jeff wheres my car I parked my car right here man

I don't know!

Now a joke is a joke and fun and games are chill

But this isn't funny this is straight up ill

Now there's a limit to humour and this is gone too far

I ain't laughing no more y'all now who stole my car

I don't know man

I don't know if y'all ever had a car stolen before

But it's a real crazy feeling when you walk out the door

And you don't need a map or any kind of chart

That your standing in the spot where your car used to be parked

Now you know you parked your car their but yet you keep looking

Cause your mind didn't except yet that somebody took it

So your scratching your head and trying to get things clear and

theres always some idiot who says

You sure you parked here

To call the police would be the move that's smart

But instead you keep looking where you know you didn't park

Searching for reasons like maybe tickets you owed

Something to justify that maybe it got towed

But not stolen naa never forget it

But then you ask yourself well where the hell is it

If there was a prize you'd win dummy of the year

Cause you looking somewhere else when you know you parked it

here

So to never never land you find yourself strolling

And when you finally except that its stolen

You call the police and they come and say

That's the 437th car stolen today

As if that's something that he really needed to mention

Then they start asking you real dumb questions like

When's the last time that you saw it

You idiot right before they stole it

Now your mad this cop is talking to you

And somebody's in your car heading to kalamazoo

Officer fool or whoever you are can you please get off your butt

and find who stole my car

I remember my first car never forget it

A candy red apple irub windows be tinted

Talk about fast like a rocket to drive

When from zero to 60 in like 5 point 5

And matching red rims but that wasn't enough

It had a ca phone for when I wanted to reach out and touch

An alpine stereo that straight up rocked

With 12 inch woofers you could hear for blocks

The first day I got it I was fronting real hard

I could hear people saying damn look at that car

I was hyped and I wanted my friends to check it out

So I went to the spot where they usually hangin out

Just my luck nobody standing outside

I really didn't feel like parking my ride

So I honked my horn but nobody was coming

I said what the heck I ran inside and left it running

I was inside for 20 seconds that's all

I found my friends and said you gotta check this out y'all

But when we came back out the car wasn't there

Man you ain't buy nothing I did I swear

My friends went inside I was mad they didn't believe me

Now I'm standing outside at the spot my car used to be

It was hard to figure out what to do all alone

But then I got it call the car phone

Fresh princes car

Yo thief bring my car back now before I bust your

Hold up wait a minute pal

Seems like you kinda forgot the keys

I thought man he's right well bring it back please

Hello listen thief don't hang up

Then luckily jeff pulled up

I told him what had happened someone's stolen my car

I said come on jeff lets get him he cant be far

We rode around for about 20 minutes

When we were just about to say forget it

When I spotted him

I said jeff go get it

We pulled up behind him and man he jetted

He was driving all wild and fast like he was getting points for

the stuff that he crashed

I called him on the car phone again and I said

Of course you realise when I catch you your dead

All through philly was a high speed chasin

Dude was playing around like he thought we was racing

A hundred miles an our and he lost control

And slammed my car into a telephone pole

I ran to the car I said man you okay

He said yeah so I punched him in the face

The cops came up as if it was my fault

They say me punch dude and charged me with assault

If his neck was closer I probably would have grabbed it

He told the cops that I said he could have it

I calmed down and they got things straight

I saw half my car in seventh street the other half in eighth

I wanna just jump in the ocean

My car looked like it was a leggo explosion

Why does life have to be so hard

Don't laugh next time it could be your car