Oxygin

I know I need to learn to live with all the things I can't change

I hate the fact that I feel nothing or I'm reeling in pain

I need to shake this fucking habit, so I try, but I can't

And I look down on other addicts when we're one and the same

Remember back, I'm pushin' twenty, those were simpler times

That's when we met, and ever since you're never far from my mind

I broke my ankle playin' ball, and so it's you I'm prescribed

And even through all of the pain, you make me feel I could fly

A couple weeks, and now you're gone and now I'm feelin' the stress

I always wanted to feel something, maybe nothing is best

My friends and family start to question if I'm feelin' depressed

But I don't really give a damn, just put me back on the meds

I've been lost in my head

My homie Jack said he dealt with the same shit

He said he started drinkin' to deal with the pain quick

All you need is a fifth and it's cool to remain lit

So he handed me a bottle, said: Take about eight sips

I'm faded, but I wanna feel straight numb

So I drink the rest of the bottle, liquor burnin' my gums

Woke up the next day at around a quarter to one

My peers would say that: Man I had fun, right?

I've been lyin', I've been sayin' I'm fine

But I've been feeling low and I don't know why

Another night, I feel empty inside

Down bottle after bottle of whatever I find

Feel the weight lift off me

Someone tell my mom I'm sorry

I don't wanna lie, I've been losin' my mind

They tell me "Take a pill" until I feel alright

The present day been feelin' sick, think I'm just bidin' my time

I take a shot of somethin' strong to keep that shit off my mind

All my friends started families and they left you behind

And here I am drinkin' any can or bottle I find

My body took you in as blood and so we're never apart

Some real shit, you the closest someone's been to my heart

But just like everything I love, you fuckin' tear me apart

Just like everything I love, you fuckin' tear me apart

I wanna be there for my son, daughter, wife—I mean my ex-wife now

I guess that time really flies when you're drunk on the couch

I wanna shake this fuckin' habit, I just don't know how

So you would love to see me sick until I almost drown

And so you keep me on the brink of barely livin' and death

As long as I'm alive, yeah, you know you're gettin' my cheque

You pray my son and daughter will follow me in my steps

You'll create our loves a fact that I'm broke and broken and dead

Can go a day without food, I can't go a day without you

When I try, I get the shakes 'til my face turns blue

Lost my job, wife, life for a bottle of booze

You promised you would make me happy, we know that's not true

I tried every drug in the book, but they never hit me the same

I told my doc that I'm down, he put some pills in my name

It doesn't matter the problem, the fix is always the same

Always takin' the easy route, like I'm never willin' to change, damn

Now blamin' everybody but me

With you inside my system, everybody used to love me

But now my friends, family, my kids, they can't even trust me

Been losin' all my control and I let you fuckin' become me

No more! I said no fuckin' more!

I know you think I'm lyin', I said this to you before

This time I'm fuckin' ready, it's time to show you the door

This life is mine, it never was yours!

I've been lyin', I've been sayin' I'm fine

But I've been feelin' low and I don't know why

Another night, I feel empty inside

Down bottle after bottle of whatever I find

Feel the weight lift off me

Someone tell my mom I'm sorry

I don't wanna lie, I've been losin' my mind

They tell me "Take a pill" until I feel alright