They Never Gave Boo-berry A Chance

They never gave Boo-Berry a chance did they?

He was always the smallest of the three cereal characters.

He never really said anything to promote his cereal,

He just sat there and floated like the true ghost he was.

Those other two bastards Frankenberry and Count Chocula...

Boy, they just took all of the fame and popularity away from him.

They always blabbed and blabbed,

"Blah Blah! Count Chocula is Great!"

"Blah Blah! Frankenberry is the shit!"

And yeah "blah blah" there's that Boo-Berry guy too, right?

I've heard it all before...

It was like it took everything out of them to even mention Boo-Berry's cereal,

Let alone include him in a commercial.

Well guess what Chocula?

Cocoa pebbles and Cocoa crispies kicked your cereal's ass to this very day.

And I still hate you.

Oh, and I'm not leaving you out Frankenberry!

I would rather drink my own piss than eat your pathetic pink cereal!

Boo-Berry is the only thing I would ever eat. He knew his cereal good.

He had faith that it would sell without all of the cheap promotion tactics

That both of you used...

I was walking around in the city, and I saw Boo-Berry sitting on a sidewalk

With all of the leftover boxes of cereal he had left.

And he was holding out a coffee cup while asking for change.

He told me he couldn't stop being a ghost and go to heaven until

He found someone who actually liked his cereal.

I was shocked to find this out, and I couldn't believe that I was the only one

On the planet to actually liked his cereal.

It seemed so iompossible for everyone not to love his cereal!

Well I bought every last box of cereal he had. Then he said,

"Thank you! I knew my patience would pay off some day. Thank you so much!"

Then he went up to heaven, just like that.

Now I have hundreds of these Boo-Berry boxes.

Some of them still even have the collectors Boo-Berry figurines.

I have them all on my wall.

I melted all the Count Chocula and Frankenberry ones already

Because I hate them so much...

But, I have a huge "Ode to Boo-Berry" in my room now.

And I'm eating his cereal and loving life.

And none of you traitors can have any of the cereal.

None of you...