Don't Go Reaching Across My Plate

If one thing in this world

I just can't stand

Is bein' at the table wit' an ill-mannered man

Now, if he's sittin' on your left

Before you could eat a bite

He'll reach across your plate

An' you know that ain't right

Now I like to eat, as well as any man

But there's some rules, a fool should understand

When ya have one little helpin'

An' one extra piece of cake

I tell ev'rybody, don't go reachin' across my plate

I was at a party last night, at over Big Murray

Cat reached 'cross my plate

Got a coat sleeve in my gravy

I didn't say a word, just looked him dead in the eye

He reached across my plate, an' cut him a piece a pie

Now I don't care if he did it for a prank

I don't care, if you had a drink

Especially when I'm out, a-with my date

Now don't you go reachin' across MY plate

At a party last week, there was some high-class folks

Ev'rything on the table, an' that ain't no joke

They had barbecue possum1, rattlesnake gravy

Chicken fried skunk2, an' it smelt real crazy

Ev'rything went fine, but one thing made me blue

A cat reached across my plate, for some armadillo3 stew

Now when you at the table, you act real nice

You say, "pass me that" or "pass me the platter"

But just because you hungry, an' happen to come in late

Don't you go reachin', across MY plate

(Spoken:

"Pass some a-that turkey over there, baby!"

"No, don't give me none of that skunk, I don't want none a-that"

"I, I beg your pardon"

"If this cat stop reachin' 'cross my plate, I can maybe ask for somethin'"

"A pass me a little a-that turkey there, baby"

Fading:

Na na na na-na-na-na

Yeah-heya

"Party' nice, party's nice"

"Yeah, ah give gimme some a that chicken over there, baby"

"Chicken fried skunk? "ah no"