Slow Burn

It begins with a dark glowing ember,

something black burning it's way out of me.

Searing the flesh,

pain is the only thing I feel,

scars all I see.

Oh no the fire's burning my insides again,

what can I do to silence my desire tonight?

Face consumer reason leaving all the ashes there,

you won't catch me for granting my decision,

I can't keep telling myself what I want to hear,

I can't just close my eyes.

I know that it's killing me,

and it's poisoning the best of me,

but I say, I don't want to believe.

So let me tell you boy, tell you boy,

about the lies I lead.

That is how it kills, I got some flames and gasoline

Broken teeth replace the blackout memories in my head

Wreckage from the blast, it often shakes me to the floor

(to the floor)

I know it's over but I can't go home tonight.

And after this I feel as empty as the night before,

feel the pain and yet I'm still begging for more.

Masochistic, nihilistic, gurging wrecked up thoughts

My life's a mess and I can't find a way to fix it.

I can't keep telling myself what I want to hear,

I can't just close my eyes

(my eyes, my eyes, my fucking eyes)

I know that it's killing me,

and it's poisoning the best of me,

but I say, I don't want to believe.

So let me tell you boy, tell you boy,

about the lies I lead.

Calling, calling out.

The darkness reaches up my soul,

I'm riddled with self-doubt.

Crawling, crawling out,

my will to fight will more than suffice,

while others will lay down.

It's only as dark as you make it.

I know that it's killing me,

and it's poisoning the best of me,

but I say, I don't want to believe.

So let me tell you boy, tell you boy,

about the lies I lead.