Slow Glide to Mellow Freak

It's a slow glide to mellow freak

Sang stumpy as loud as he could

While he pounded away

On a five string he made

Out of old dirty diapers and wood

I'll be a bitch in a minute

You swafty cold fuckers

He screamed at the top of his lungs

Then he peed in his pants while he spat out a dance

And reverted to speaking in tongues

And it's a slow glide to mellow freak

And easier than harder than not

To be given the chance to be all you cant's

And gag on the goodies that you got

It's a slow glide to mellow freak

Sang Betty one day at the store

She thought the bananas

Were rabid pirhannas

And now she don't shop there any more

Now she sits in her house

In a tangle of dishes

And swears that she speaks to the dead

In a language forgotten

And her brain is all rotten

And the worms run a bank in her head

It's a slow glide to mellow freak

They said of old Johnny McNeil

Just a crafty old fucker

Who called himself tucker

Whose wife died one night at the wheel

Now he sits in a lump

In the backyard

His eyes the cold color of snot

He talks to the flowers

For hours and hours

And shits in his pants when he's hot

It's a slow glide to mellow freak

The proof was in Sally McKane

A sensible lady

Who went kind a crazy

And OD'ed on high grade cocaine

She had a sweet tooth for chocolate

She'd eat it for supper they said that she just wouldn't stop

One day she tried coke and I swear its no joke

That she snorted it up till she popped