The Ad-dressing Of Cats

You've heard of several kinds of cat

And my opinion now is that

You should need no interpreter

To understand our character

You've learned enough to take the view

That cats are very much like you

You've seen us both at work and games

And learnt about our proper names

Our habits and our habitat

But how would you ad-dress a cat?

So, first, your memory I'll jog

And say: A cat is not a dog

(So, first, your memory I'll jog)

(And say: A cat is not a dog)

With cats, some say one rule is true

Don't speak till you are spoken to

Myself I do not hold with that

I say: You should ad-dress a cat

But always keep in mind that he

Resents familiarity

You bow, and taking off your hat

Ad-dress him in this form

Oh, Cat!

Before a cat will condescend

To treat you as a trusted friend

Some little token of esteem

Is needed, like a dish of cream

And you might now and then supply

Some caviar or Strasbourg pie

Some potted grouse or salmon paste

He's sure to have his personal taste

And so, in time, you'll reach your aim

And call him by his name

(So this is this and that is that)

(And that's how you ad-dress a cat)

(A cat's entitled to expect these evidences of respect)

(So this is this and that is that)

(And that's how you ad-dress a cat)

(So this is this and that is that)

(And that's how you ad-dress a cat)

(A cat's entitled to expect these evidences of respect)

(So this is this and that is that)

(And that's how you ad-dress a cat)