Cosmo Jarvis

Lyric guide

Jessica Alba's Number

Jessica Alba's Number lyrics by Cosmo Jarvis. When I'm watching TV, The girls are all I see, They're singing and dancing And acting and modelling, None of...

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Lyrics

Jessica Alba's Number

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When I'm watching TV,

The girls are all I see,

They're singing and dancing

And acting and modelling,

None of them would look at me.

If I went to Jessica Simpson,

She'd think I was an ignoramus,

And if I tried to talk to Cameron Diaz,

She'd say "get lost boy, I'm famous!"

All the women 'round here,

Have BO or they have rolls,

And some lucky bloke right now,

Is probably hugging Beyonce Knowles.

If I had Jessica Alba's number,

I'd call her right up,

And I'd ask her what she's doing

At half past three,

And then I'd ask her

If she'd marry me,

If I had Jessica Alba's number,

I'd be the luckiest guy in the world,

I'd be the luckiest guy in the universe,

And then some dick would try

To steal her purse,

So I'd smack him in the head

With my mobile phone and I'd say,

"Hey mister, leave Jessie alone!"

If I had Jessica Alba's number,

If I had Jessica Alba's number,

If I had Jessica Alba's number,

If I had Jessica Alba's number,

When fit girls get shot in films

I'm always in tears,

I'd like to go see Toy Story 2,

With just me and Britney Spears,

And then she'd say "Hit me baby,

One more time", and I'd say:

"No way Britney,

Domestic Violence is a crime",

I like the one from Showgirls,

When she's dancing

'Round those poles,

Or the really, really fit one,

Who sings in the Pussycat Dolls.

I've nearly got a moustache,

And they still wouldnt talked at me,

Kate Winslet naked in Titanic,

Or the lesbian from the OC.

If I had Jessica Alba's number,

I'd call her right up,

And I'd ask her what she's doing

At half past three,

And then I'd ask her

If she'd marry me,

If I had Jessica Alba's number,

I'd be the luckiest guy in the world,

I'd be the luckiest guy in the universe,

And then some dick would try

To steal her purse,

So I'd smack him in the head

With my mobile phone and I'd say,

"Hey mister, leave Jessie alone!"

If I had Jessica Alba's number,

If I had Jessica Alba's number,

If I had Jessica Alba's number,

If I had Jessica Alba's number,

If I had Jennifer Lopez's number,

Or Kate Nash's Number,

Or the girl who was in

Transformers' number,

Or Jessica Alba's number...

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Who performs "Jessica Alba's Number"?

Cosmo Jarvis performs "Jessica Alba's Number", and this lyric page sits inside the Cosmo Jarvis catalog on LyroVerse.

Are there related songs to explore after "Jessica Alba's Number"?

Yes. The related section below points to Betty and Blame It On Me with a short reason for opening each page next.

Where can I find more songs by Cosmo Jarvis?

Use the artist link near the top of the page or the related paths section below to keep moving through Cosmo Jarvis's lyric pages.

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