My Band

I don't know dude...

I think everyone's all jealous and shit cuz I'm like the lead singer of a band dude...

And I think everyone's got a fuckin problem with me dude...

And they need to take it up with me after the show...

Because...

These chicks don't even know the name of my band...

But they're all on me like they wanna hold hands...

Cuz once I blow they know that i'll be the man...

All because I'm the lead singer of my band...

[Eminem]

So I get off stage right and drop the mic

Walk up to the hot chicks and I'm all like

"Sup ladies, my name's Slim Shady.

I'm the lead singer in D12 baby"

They're all like "Oh my god it's him"

"Becky oh my fuckin' god it's Eminem"

"I swear to fuckin god dude you fuckin rock"

"Please Marshall please let me suck your cock"

And by now the rest of the fellas get jealous

Especially when I drop the beat and do my acapellas

All the chicks start yellin', all the hot babes

Throw their bras and their shirt and their panties on stage

So like every single night they pick a fight with me

But when we fight it's kinda like sibling rivalry

Cuz they're back on stage the next night with me

Dude I just think you're tryna steal the light from me

Yesterday Kuniva tried to pull a knife on me

Cause I told him Jessica Alba's my wife to be

This rock star shit, it's the life for me

And all the other guys just despise me because

These chicks don't even know the name of my band...

But they're all on me like they wanna hold hands...

Cuz once I blow they know that i'll be the man...

All because I'm the lead singer of my band...

My band

Roxanne

My band

[Swift]

You just wanna see a nigga backwards don't you

Hey dad how come we don't rap on Protools

Smash these vocals and do a performance

But we in the van and he in a tour bus

You don't want my autograph, yous a liar

And no I'm Swift (oh I thought you was Kuniva)

What the hell is wrong with that dressing room

Cuz my shit is lookin smaller than a decimal

See I know how to rap, see it's simple but

All I did was read a Russell Simmons book

So I'm more intact, tryna get on the map

Doin' jumpin jacks whilin' get whipped on my back

[Kuniva and Kon Artist]

Look at Em little punk ass thinkin' he the shit

Yeah I know man find himself takin on a flick

Hey I thought we had an interview with DJ Clue

([Em:] No I had an interview not you two)

You gonna be late for soundcheck

Man I ain't goin' to soundcheck

But our mics are screwed up and his always sound best

You know what man I'ma say somethin

Hey yo Em

([Em:] You got somethin to say?!)

Man no

I thought you bout to tell him off, what's up

Man I'ma tell him when I feel like it, man shut up

And you ain't even back me up when we s'posed to be crew

When I was bout to talk right after you

I swear, I swear man

These chicks don't even know the name of my band...

But they're all on me like they wanna hold hands...

Cuz once I blow they know that i'll be the man...

All because I'm the lead singer of my band...

[ Proof]

They say the lead singers rock, but the group does not

Once we sold out arenas to the amusement park

I'm gonna let the world know that proof is hot

I should cut his mic off when the musics starts

Ready to snap on a dumbass fan

Every time i hear (Hey dude I love your band)

We ain't a band bitch we don't play instruments

So why he get 90 and we only get 10 percent

And these guys they can find every area code

([Em:] Proof carry my bag)

Bitch carry your own

Can't make it to the stage, security in my way

(Who the fuck are you? Where's Obie and Dre?!)

[Verse 5 - Bizarre]

Goddammit I'm sick of this group

Time for me to go solo and make some loot

I told you I made the beats and wrote all the raps

Till Kon Artist slipped me some crack

Lose Yourself video I was in the back

Superman video I was in the back

Fuck the media, I got some suggestions

Fuck Marshall, ask us the questions

Like who's D12, how we get started

(What about Eminem?)

Bitch are you retarded?

Anyway I'm the popularest guy in the group

Big ass stomach, bitches think I'm cute (hey sexy)

50 told me to do situps to get buff

I did two and a half and then I couldn't get up

Fuck D12, I'm outta this band

I'm gonna start a group with the real Roxanne

[Eminem]

Girl why cant you see your the only one for me

and it just tears my ass apart to know that you don't know my name...

[Chorus - Bizarre]

These chicks don't even know the name of my band...(ha ha)

But they're all on me like they wanna hold hands...(Fuck Marshall)

Cuz once I blow I know that i'll be the man...

All because I'm the lead singer of my band...

My Band [Repeated 9x]

[Outro]

The hottest boy band in the world...

D12!

[Eminem as a salsa singer]

I'm the lead singer of my band, I get all the girl's to take off their underpants

And the lead singer of my band, my salsa

Makes all the pretty girl's wan to dance

My salsa, look out for my next single, it's called My Salsa...

My salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, my salsa

Makes all the pretty girls wan to dance

And take off their underpants

My salsa makes all the pretty girls wan to dance

And take off their underpants, my salsa

(Where'd everybody go?)