Origin

This is the death of my origin

No rest for the sick and weary

Just a rope growing tighter around my neck

For twenty-five years, I've tried

So hard but now it feels like twenty-five too long

Just for a moment, I wish that I could breathe

Without the weight of the world crushing down on me

Better off dead, no burden to my friends

No more days of wishing I won't have to wake up the next

Does it matter if I am dead or alive?

The future seems so dark but

I'm trying to keep my head above the water

I am so sick and fed up with the burden of my consciousness

The voices in my head, I only hear them

Say that I'll be dead before the dawn

Wave goodbye to your sanity and just

Remember you'll never truly be at peace

No one knows how it feels to hate the one that lies in your own skin

I'm trying to keep my head above the

Water but the tide keeps rising and rising

So safe, so small with the rope tight around my neck

One last goodbye to remind you that although I'm sick,

I love you still and I hope you won't forget me when I'm gone

The proper way to die was not a choice for me to make

I held on as long as I could but I lost my grip

The anxiety that plagued me is but a bitter memory

I'll reap what I have sown and take that step to bring me peace

God help me if you exist, this is not a world I'm meant to live in