She Useta Be

[Devin the Dude:]

That's her, man?

Naw, that ain't her, man!

You bullshittin', man!

That ain't her, man!

Hell yeah!

I remember her, nigga!

[Devin the Dude:]

I was tenth grade sophomore, she was in the twelfth

She used to call me childish, 'cause on her booty I felt

It was big, it was bouncy

It was soft, yet firm

That's why I went to school - I wasn't tryin' to learn!

I never got my turn

She never gave me a chance

I used to daydream of takin' off those Chic jean pants

At the High School Dance

She just let it all hang

Bootin' it over, makin' that ass swang

The DJ was from New Orleans, the music was hype

She got loose all night, I think the juice was spiked!

I was high as a kite, I thought the time was right

To ask her for a dance - she said, "Naw, that's alright!"

I played it off, walked back across the flo'

Fuck that, ho! Didn't wanna see her no mo'

But, about 150 pounds and 10 years later

Seen her at the grocery store, she tryin' to

holla' at a player

[Devin the Dude:]

She useta be so fine to me

Now she'...fatter than a motherfucker!

That ho is huge!

That's a big ole bee-itch!

She useta be so fine to me

[Devin the Dude:]

I tried to run, I tried to duck

But I couldn't get away, she was wide as fuck!

She ask me for a hug, I buried my face 'tween in her titties

But all I could think about was how she used to bullshit me!

Back in the day, when she was cheerleadin'

They was fine with all this screamin', had my eyes was bleedin'

I was concentratin' on her, though

Them pretty eyes

That pretty ass, them pretty titties, and them pretty thighs

But now, she's a hefty heffer

Seems like everything on her body just melted together

But it wasn't no thang, gave her my number and all

And then I stepped, she said..

[Girl:] You better call me, nigga

[Devin:] I'mma call you, girl

[Devin:] Y'know I'mma call you

[Devin:] So - uhhh - is that the 713 or the 832?

[Girl:] Chirp me!

[Devin:] Okay, okay - that'll work, that'll work

[Devin the Dude:]

She useta be so fine to me

Now she's...fatter than a motherfucker!

That ho is huge!

From elegant to elephant

She useta be so fine to me

[Devin the Dude:]

I couldn't wait to go and tell all the niggas I went to school with

How she used to be look like "Ohhhh, damn!"

Now she looks like, "Oooh, shit!"

But before I picked up the phone, I sat back and thought

Maybe she got a problem and it wasn't her fault

So, I grabbed the number she gave me and used it

Wasn't no hard feelings, had to call her to prove it

"Whasssup? This D? Whatcha doin'?"

She said, "I'm in the kitchen!"

"Fixin' some pork chops and chicken."

Stove Top Stuffin', macaroni and ham

With some purple whole peas and yams

I'm like "Damn!"

"How many kids you got?"

She said, "None."

"Where you live girl? Shit! Here I come!"

[Girl:] Come on in, nigga

[Girl:] I'll fix you a plate and everythang

[Girl:] Whassup?

[Devin:] Oooooooh!

[Devin:] Did these purple whole peas yourself, girl?

[Girl:] Sho' did

[Devin:] Ooooooh!

[Devin the Dude:]

She useta be so fine to me

(I like that pork chop)

Fatter than a motherfucker!

[Girl:]

And that chicken

[Devin the Dude]

Yeah, I like the breasts, too

Oooh! Speaking of breasts, what cha got there?

[Devin:]

She useta be so fine to me

(Grab that one, nibble on that one)

Fatter than a motherfucker!

[Guy 1:] You went over and did it, huh?

[Devin:] Awww yeah, man

[Devin:] Had to go over and had to hit it and split it man

[Devin:] Had to get wit' it, man - the way she did it

[Devin and the guys:] Hahahahaaha!

[Devin:] Yeah, man, but I had an old school picture man

[Devin:] I had it in my wallet, man, for so long

[Devin:] So as I was jukin' that head, I was

lookin' at that picture, man

[Devin:] At the same time, tryin' to remember

[Guy 1:] Picturin' how she useta look

[Guy 1:] Had to hit it because she used to look good

[Guy 2:]'Cause she used to be fine

[Guy 1:] She useta

[Devin:] I hit it, too, man

[Devin:] I was about to go home, laid on one titty and grabbed the other

[Devin:] And it was over with

[Devin and the guys:] Hahahahaha!

[Devin the Dude (Guy):]

She useta be so fine to me

Now she's...fatter than a motherfucker!

She's livin' large

(She used to be so fine, too!)

From elegant to elephant

[Guy:]

Still cute, she still got the same face

She still cute

She just got big ankles

Ankles wide