Be My Friend (The Facebook Song)

FEMALE 1

There was nothing to do on a Friday night

No one was calling my phone

The prospect of plans seemed out of sight

And I sat in my room all alone

So I booted up my computer

And I bought a new sweater online

But while browsing J-Crew

A loneliness grew

And soon I was desperate to find

Something to pick up my mood just a bit

That's when it happened, that's when I got hooked

On the internet site I can't seem to quit

That's when I joined...

The Facebook

MALE 2

Whenever I feel lousy

FEMALE 2

Whenever life's a bore

MALE 1

I count my friends in order

I've got...

ALL

Five hundred and four

FEMALE 1

I search the kids from high school

From my vast array of friends

MALE 1

You can tell if they are smart or not

By the schools they now attend

MALE 2

I post up on my profile

All my latest greatest news

FEMALE 1

I know to never search for folks

With the wrong political views

FEMALE 2

You can read my posted quotes

My favorite artists and their tunes

MALE 1

If you're not on the Facebook

I suggest you join it soon

ALL

Please be my friend on the Facebook

Click accept, I'll add your name to my list

You need me to be your friend on the Facebook

If you refuse, I'll forget that you exist

Help me feel alive

Be friend five hundred and five

Ooo

FEMALE 1

If you want to talk and gossip

FEMALE 2

And you always need the scoop

BOTH FEMALES

You can share your dirty secrets

With a private member group

FEMALE 2

You can always change your picture

From a hot one to a joke

MALE 1

And if your photo's sexy

Then I might give you a poke

FEMALE 1

Yes!

ALL

Please be my friend on the Facebook

And I'll be looking at you when you don't even know

You need me to be your friend on the Facebook

You'll never be really cool if you say no

To socially survive

Be friend five hundred and five

Ooo

MALE 1

Whenever I get horny

And I wanna find a girl

I never just click search

I'm clicking global for the world

MALE 2

When I see a girl I like

I shoot right from the hip

I send I note to see

If she wants to be

In an open relationship

ALL

Please be my friend on the Facebook

Though I don't like you, we'll pretend that we're close

You need me to be your friend on the Facebook

Life is about whoever collects the most

Friends to make you thrive

Be friend five hundred and five

When everyone is in on it

You need to take a look

MALE 1

Be a friend

MALE 2

Be my friend

FEMALE 1

My special friend

FEMALE 2

My fakest friend

ALL

On the Facebook

Facebook