Both Sides (feat. Kamilah Marshall)

I was once told that walking through

A doorway could cause someone to forget

Even the most precious memories they had

Memories of good

Memories of bad

Memories of love and of loss

All tucked away neatly

Stored like the worn out blankets

That were kept to dress the rainy days

And bad habits that happen from time to time

Or what it felt like to rest your head on a friend's shoulder

That still carries with it the

Creases from where you last placed your heart

Just like that

Gone within a single step

That somehow three beams and an imaginary

Line drawn across some old aching floorboards

Were all that stood between you and the infinite silence

Of the very things that once colored your mind with sound

It's funny

You can make yourself believe almost anything if you

If you think about it for long enough

I was once told that the love I felt beating inside my chest

Was nothing more than my mind playing an unfair trick on my heart

And like a pair of dice dancing along the uneven pavement

Their fate, much like yours or mine had already been decided

That even the cracks that drew their faults between two opposing sides

Could not escape a fate that was always destined to be sealed

To think

That someone could actually believe

That the swelling tides of my heart

Were no more than an anxious highway of ins and outs

Anchoring my imagination to the

Castles I've been building in the sky

Well, maybe "they" are the crazy ones

Then again

I have been known to misplace my hope in the way things fall

And if I had to confess there stands a greater

Chance that I have all but lost my mind in here

So I suppose it's better off this way

Because I've always believed that the odds of finding what you seek

Tend to favor those who are open to seeking them in the first place

And I for one have never quite understood how

Odds stand to get even without that frame in mind

To be clear

I've seen a million faces

I've seen a million different faces

Each one mirroring that of your own

And still, none of them felt like home to me

None of them have felt like you

So here we are

And I can vaguely and strangely trace your outline

I can remember what it felt like to hold you

I can remember what it was like to stare blindly

Into your eyes for what felt like an eternity

How could I forget that?

I could never forget that

I could never forget you

No matter how long it takes for my words to make their way

Through the vastness of this place we've called home

I unto you and you unto me

I say them and will continue to do so

Day after day

Night after night

Never knowing if you'll actually hear them

There is no place for time here

Just overlapping moments where I thought I'd found you

Where I thought I heard the sound of your breath

Where I felt your heart as it waited patiently for mine

Retracing the steps that we left in the life before last

Before our eyes closed

Before the great divide

Before a doorway stood between you and me

As it stands

I've found myself in that doorway again

With both feet in and your heart on my sleeve

But I can't bring myself to walk through this time

Not yet at least

Not until I take one last look and see that it was you

That it was always you

Our hearts strewn across those old fragile floorboards

The silhouettes of each and every one of our memories

Playing out like a story that we both know we've seen before

I remember now

This was where I first found you

And beyond those closed doors

I will find you again

My love

I will find you again

I will find you again

I will find you

I will find you