Marry Well

[major bouvier] (spoken)

Forgive me, ladies, but we live in perilous times.

If you want to anchor your self in a uncertain world you have only one recourse:

(sung)

With your eye on the ball and your feet on the fairway-

Hit it high little girls, marry well!

(man)

Four!

[major bouvier]

Every point under par is a leg up the stairway

To the sky little girls, marry well.

Find a staunch young patrician,

Republican!

With the blood and the brains to excel!

Like the fine strapping lad your late grandma ma had

Meaning i, little girls, marry well.

Ridiculous woman my daughter edith

Flying at the face of every good solid value i ever tried to instill in her

God knows i've tried to teach her tried to teach all of my brood-

[edie & major bouvier](spoken)

The hallmark of aristocracy is responsibility

[major bouvier]

Edie, oh ho ho, the last hope of the great bouvier clan.

[edie]

Oh, honestly!

[brooks]

But major bouvier, the time!

[major bouvier]

Oh alright, alright, i'm coming.

Company, fall in! ten hut!

[edie]

Chair the ball for the blind

[lee]

Treat your church to a steeple

[all]

When in doubt, little girls, marry well!

[lee]

Bail the met out of debt

[jackie]

Leave your art to the people.

[all]

And the crowd will fall under your spell!

[major bouvier]

But an unmarried lassie who's fast and loose,

Is a moose in a herd of gazelle!

[all]

Pow

[major bouvier]

Don't be picked off the pack

With your head on a plaque!

Do me proud, little girls

[all]

Marry well

[major bouvier]

Its your future that counts

They say greatness always skips a generation

So now its up to you to burnish the family crest

And remember girls- this crest of our french royal providence

It took a while for it

We paid a pile for it

So go end up spinsters and diletants!

The name bouvier will surpass all others

All of your uncles, aunts-

[edith]

Oh ah oh oh oh oh oh

[major bouvier]

And mothers

[lee]

Picture lee in milan with a prince and a villa.

[major bouvier]

Sally forth, little girl! very nice.

[jackie]

Jackie b. in paris, simply bathes in chinchilla

[edie]

As for me, joe will more than suffice!

[major bouvier]

Good girl!

With a grandfather's blessing, i wish you love!

Someone there when your hair goes to gray, and i'll strut in my spats down the isle of saint pat's!

[brooks]

Marry high!

[edie]

Marry proud!

[jackie and lee]

Nouveau riche ain't allowed!

[brooks]

Upper class!

[lee]

Upper crust!

[jackie]

Standard oil and morgan trust!

[edie]

Marry young!

[brooks]

Marry chaste!

[major bouvier]

Or if not, then in haste-

[all]

Marry well, and you're well on your way!