Gasoline

We were standing in the back of that dingy hall

You had your glass of stout and I had my water

Battleship grey was the paint on the walls

And I felt like a lamb eager for the slaughter

It had been a long week and the nights were getting longer

I tried to cry myself to sleep but only stayed awake

I tried to pull myself together but my despair was stronger

And I wondered if anyone would mourn me at my wake

Somedays you build your bridges

And other days you let them burn

Sometimes you pour the gasoline and stand there waiting

I tried to call her up so I could say I’m sorry

She didn’t answer so I just left a message

I stood there quietly, underneath a sky so starry

Wishing that I had the courage to turn a brand new page

I should never have gone to that cursed party

I meant what I said but I should never have said it

I should have kept my mouth shut but I got so angry

You were just too damn polite to try and make me quit

Somedays you build your bridges

And other days you let them burn

Sometimes you pour the gasoline and stand there waiting

Somedays you get the answer

Sometimes you never learn

Sometimes you strike the match and stand there waiting

And I went home that night to slit my wrists

But you were there and you’d been waiting

I told you I was done and I knew I’d not be missed

I couldn’t bring myself to do it when you started crying

The love I feel for you makes me afraid of dying

Somedays you build your bridges

And other days you let them burn

Sometimes you pour the gasoline and stand there waiting

Somedays you get the answer

Sometimes you never learn

Sometimes you strike the match and stand there waiting

Sometimes you find forgiveness

Sometimes you show no mercy

Sometimes the dead speak louder than the living

Sometimes it’s black and white

Sometimes the lines are grey

For now I’ll take my chances among the living