Once An Addict (Interlude)

Right, right, right, right

Something's got a hold on me

Right, right, right, right

Sometimes I think pain is just a lack of understanding

If we could only understand it all, would we feel no pain?

God must feel no pain

Something's got a hold on me

Only joy

Does this mean even our suffering pleases him?

Lost in a cloud of marijuana

Young Carolina nigga, fish out of water

Step-daddy just had a daughter with another woman

Mama ain't recover yet

Callin' me at 12 at night

She drunk as fuck and I'm upset

'Cause why she always using me for crutch?

Growin' up I used to always see her up

Late as shit, cigarette smoke and greatest hits from Marvin Gaye

She kill a whole bottle of some cheap chardonnay

I gotta leave this house 'cause part of me dies when I see her like this

Too young to deal with pain

I'd rather run the streets than see her kill herself

So 'Ville became my escape from a feelin' I hate

Mama cursing me out

Depression's such a villainous state

I used to stay out later on purpose

Subconsciously I was nervous that if I came home early

Then what would surface was her inner demons

And then I'd have to end up seein' my hero on ground zero

Tears flow while Al Green blow

Love and happiness

I wish that I could say the right words to cheer her up

I wish her son's love was enough

I tell her: Mama, go to sleep

She tell me: Boy, hush

You better pray to God you never get your heart crushed

I shake my head in frustration

Head to my room and I can still hear the tunes with my door shut

Fuck it though, a couple more months I'll be gone

Off to college and dorms

Foolin' myself, thinkin' problems are gone

But now it's 1 AM and my mama dialin' my phone

I know she intoxicated and soon this high that I'm on comes crashin' down

She lit, talkin' drunk shit, I'm pissed

But I'm still all ears like Basset Hounds

Thinkin' to myself: Maybe my mama need help

Don't she got work it the morning?

Why she do this to herself?

Hate how she slurrin' her words

Soundin' so fuckin' absurd

This ain't the woman I know, why I just sit and observe?

Why don't I say how I feel?

When I do, she's defensive for real

Well maybe things get better with time, I heard it heals

Little did I know how deep her sadness would go

Lookin' back, I wish I woulda did more instead of runnin