For An Actress

There's a lot of you about at the moment

Is there anything that you will not endorse?

Every time I see your face before me

It reminds me that we once had intercourse

And I can see the single bed where we lay tangled

Our hands, our limbs, our bodies intertwined

I still have the book that you once gave me

It's a shame perhaps that I never got it signed

My mother always calls when you're on TV

Yes, and this was charming long ago

Back when we would pull off of the highway

Just to hear you on the radio

And I recall the last time that I saw you

We were going to lead such different lives

Yes, and it was me who sent you packing

For the woman who til lately was my wife

And I loved you in the remake of Rear Window

A film we saw in 1983

Then it was James Stewart and Grace Kelly

Now it's me and you on my TV

So thank me when you're holding up the Oscar

I'll never sell your story to the press

Though sometimes when I'm feeling broke and hopeless

I'm tempted by the money, I'll confess

And I wish you very well in your career

Just as I wished you very well in bed

And if you ever need some soundtrack music

I write that shit standing on my head

And I loved you in the remake of Rear Window

A film we saw in 1983

Then it was James Stewart and Grace Kelly

Now it's me and you on my TV