Jonathan Coulton
Lyric guide

The Presidents

Read The Presidents lyrics by Jonathan Coulton on LyroVerse, with linked artist context and related song paths.

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Page type: lyric reference Artist: Jonathan Coulton Canonical path: /jonathan-coulton/the-presidents Related lyric paths: 6
Lyrics

The Presidents

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Washington came first and he was perfect.

John Adams kept us out of war with France.

Jefferson made Louisiana Purchase.

In 1812 James Madison kicked the British in the pants.

James Monroe told Europe they could suck it.

John Quincy Adams looked just like his dad.

Andrew Jackson got rid of all the Indians.

Van Buren served one term, but he wasn't bad.

William Henry Harrison died early.

John Tyler annexed Texas from Mexico.

James K. Polk fought Mexico to keep it.

Taylor was a Mexican War hero.

Fillmore gave a boat to Commodore Perry.

Pierce appealed the Missouri Compromise.

Buchanan saw the Civil War's beginnings.

Lincoln saved the Union, then he died.

Andrew Johnson just survived impeachment.

General Grant enjoyed a drink or two.

Rutherford B. Hayes ended reconstruction.

Garfield was assassinated in 1882.

Arthur suspended Chinese immigration.

Cleveland made the railroad people squirm.

Harrison signed the Sherman Anti-Trust Act.

Grover Cleveland served another term.

McKinley kicked the Spanish out of Cuba.

Roosevelt was handy with a gun.

Taft was big and fat and had a mustache.

Wilson kicked some ass in World War I.

Harding said "Let's Laissez Fair with business."

Coolidge made the roaring 20s roar.

Hoover screwed the pooch in the great depression.

Roosevelt beat the Nazis in the war.

Truman dropped the bomb on Hiroshima.

Eisenhower kept the Commies well in hand.

Kennedy was killed by a magic bullet.

Johnson murdered kids in Vietnam.

Nixon was a sweating, filthy liar.

Ford gave Nixon pardon for his crimes.

Carter lusted in his heart for peanuts.

Reagan won the Cold War, and lost his mind.

George Bush Sr. poked at Saddam Hussein.

Clinton gave an intern a cigar.

W's legacy's a work in progress.

That is all the President's so far.

In the year 2005 we're out of money.

Somewhere, surely, freedom's on the march.

I don't like to make political statements.

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Who performs "The Presidents"?

Jonathan Coulton performs "The Presidents", and this lyric page sits inside the Jonathan Coulton catalog on LyroVerse.

Are there related songs to explore after "The Presidents"?

Yes. The related section below points to A Talk with George and Always The Moon with a short reason for opening each page next.

Where can I find more songs by Jonathan Coulton?

Use the artist link near the top of the page or the related paths section below to keep moving through Jonathan Coulton's lyric pages.

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