Hi, FBI

Hi FBI, I see you've found my channel

Director, you're looking lovely hey, is that new flannel?

I bet you're probably here because you wanna know

Why I turned up in all those manifestos

Well, what I think is important to understand

Is that I'm not some ringleader, okay, I am just a man

Making videos online to elicit a few laughs

So I'm not responsible for all those terrorist attacks

Listen, it's satire, it's parody, I was just joking

Can you really blame me for one or two shootings?

Okay, okay, I know it was five

That's probably why you think I'm the guy that made all those people die

But I make jokes online, broad subjects I explore

And fine, they're edgy sometimes

But it's edge and nothing more

C'mon, FBI, you have to believe

That I never really say anything that I mean

Y'know, this is a great opportunity to talk about mental health

And the broader social issues causing people to act out

Y'know, maybe instead of all this focus on me

We should be turning our heads towards, uh, society

I am sorry, I find it chilling that my brand was implicated with so many mass killings

I am so, so sorry, y'know, in the abstract

For the victims of those horrible, horrible attacks

Attacks which, by the way, I am not to blame for

For I'm a performer, my job's to entertain

I never thought that saying we should go kill groups of people

Would lead to people going and killing groups of people

I'm so sorry that people don't understand parody

I'm so sorry that I've lost so much money

I'm so sorry that people misinterpret what I said

It's real sad that all those kids got shot in the head

But, I am not responsible for anything I say

Irony and satire frees me from blame

I keep criticism at bay as I make the world worse

And you'll let me get away with it because I'm speaking this in verse

Huh? Oh, oh, I am getting arrested, oh, yeah, that's fair