Gary The Green-nosed Reindeer

In a magical land, in a magical town

Santa and his magic elves are hanging around

Building magical toys for boys and girls

To deliver to the world and bring christmas joy

The reindeer and snug in their snow-covered stable

While santa puts turkey on the dinner table

But a mile away, huddled in the snow

Gary sits scared as the arctic winds blow

Alone, on his own, forgotten and lost

Surviving on roots and the permafrost

Dreams of joining santa's team filled gary's head

And he'd walk by the stable when they had all gone to bed

He'd tap on the glass, the reindeer would laugh

Cutting gary's self-esteem painfully in half

He was rudolph's half-brother, unplanned, unwanted

By his father's indiscretions he would be forever haunted

Gary the green-nosed reindeer (reindeer)

Was of unexpected birth

But one year he saved christmas

And he proved to them his worth

All of the other reindeer (reindeer)

Used to laugh and make him cry

They never let poor gary (gary)

Fly with them up in the sky

In a big dark castle on the other side of town

Osama bin laden was wearing a frown

With a bat on his shoulder, decked in a black cape

He devised a new plan to make america shake

He said, "i'll destroy christmas, here's what i'll do:

I'll kidnap poor rudolph, it's 9/11 part two

The west will quake when their holiday is gone

Then i'll rule the world, like my name was exxon"

He snuck into the stable, so he could steal

Rudolph and he left in his jihad mobile

Santa found out the news and he said "oh, dear,

Rudolph's gone, there will be no christmas this year!"

The elves began to cry and the sky turned gray

But gary heard the sobs walking by that day

He shared rudolph's dna and had something to say

He said "i can guide your sleigh and make everything okay."

Santa said, "who are you?"

Gary said, "i'm rudolph's half brother,

You can tell 'cause my nose is green, instead of red!"

Santa said, "whatever, just put on this harness."

So then one happy christmas eve

Santa came to say, say (say)

"gary, with your nose so green

Won't you guide my christmas sleigh?"

Then all the reindeer loved him (loved him)

And they shouted out "hurray!" (hurray)

Gary the green-nosed reindeer (reindeer)

Thanks for saving christmas day

And the toys were delivered across the world

Bringing christmas joy to every boy and girl

Osama was fed up and let rudolph go

And the brothers reunited in the north pole snow

Rudolph said, "hey gary, i'm sorry we laughed

And left you forgotten, like president taft

We know it made you cry, we're sorry we were mean

We'd like you to join our reindeer team"

And that is how christmas got its colors

From the red and green noses of the reindeer brothers

You may see them flying high on christmas eve

Bringing gifts to little kids like stacy and steve

And dennis and cindy and claire and louise

Playstation 2s and green day cds

But nada for osama as they say in espanol

No gamecubes in his stocking, now santa brings him coal

Gary the green-nosed reindeer (reindeer)

Was of unexpected birth

But one year he saved christmas

And he proved to them his worth

All of the other reindeer (reindeer)

Used to laugh and make him cry

They never let poor gary (gary)

Fly with them up in the sky

So then one happy christmas eve

Santa came to say, say (say)

"gary, with your nose so green

Won't you guide my christmas sleigh?"

Then all the reindeer loved him (loved him)

And they shouted out "hurray!" (hurray)

Gary the green-nosed reindeer (reindeer)

Thanks for saving christmas day