Sloppy Seconds
Lyric guide

If I Had a Woman

Read If I Had a Woman lyrics by Sloppy Seconds on LyroVerse, with linked artist context and related song paths.

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Page type: lyric reference Artist: Sloppy Seconds Canonical path: /sloppy-seconds/if-i-had-a-woman Related lyric paths: 6
Lyrics

If I Had a Woman

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She's got the personality of Darth Vader

And the mentality of a sixth grader

I better get her now, while I still hate her

The way I hated you

While she still just a hole to crawl into

And I've still got my pride

But if I had a woman

If I had a woman that I could abuse

If I had a woman that I could cruel to

Wish I had a woman that I could refuse

And then I guess that I'd be satisfied

Why does she have to be more than just a pair of legs?

And why can't I let her be just another fertile egg?

I better get her now before I have to beg

The way I did before

While I'll still take any port in a storm

And I've still got my pride

But if I had a woman

If I had a woman that I could annoy

If I had a woman to take all the lashes

I wish I had a woman that I could destroy

'Cause then I guess that I'd be satisfied

Oh God, somebody send me a woman

'Cause I need a woman that I can despise

I need a woman that I can tear limb from limb

I need a woman to listen to lies

And then I guess that I'll be satisfied

Satisfied

Then I guess that I'll be satisfied

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Sloppy Seconds performs "If I Had a Woman", and this lyric page sits inside the Sloppy Seconds catalog on LyroVerse.

Are there related songs to explore after "If I Had a Woman"?

Yes. The related section below points to Black Roses and Blackmail with a short reason for opening each page next.

Where can I find more songs by Sloppy Seconds?

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