Where's My Legs?

You may think a man's brain stops

After he's been dead and his legs chopped off

Well, let me tell you a story to change that belief

It started back when I was still alive

My girlfriend and I were sitting side by side

When she grabbed a gun and rudely ended my life

My body lay there, dead and cold

When she dragged me down to the basement below

Where she decided to stuff me in a cardboard box

That's when her problem did arise

You see, the box she chose was to small in size

So, she chopped off my legs

Just so I could fit my future home

Then out of panic or out of stress?

She lost my legs, never to be found again

Now I cannot die unless my body's complete

So I lay in limbo, in agony, the world's first zombie amputee

First she robbed me of life now she's robbing me of death

So, if you've seen my legs, I'd like them back

Or has she fed them to her dog and cat?

If this is what life is, I don't want any part of it.