My First Stalker

She freaked when she saw me

Calmly eating my tamale

She followed me home from the diner

Now all day she be on me

On the other side of the street

You can see her through the blinds if you peek

With a book propped up on her knees and the blue hair

What do you care when I'm home what I do there?

You're creeping out my neighbors

When they grab the paper

You probably think I'm inside

Like some kind of savior

Solving world hunger

Working on sudoku

And filling in the numbers

Polishing my halo

Ooh I bet you wonder

Life can be bogus

We all wanna be noticed

But we're the ones in the background fuzzy

When the ones in the front are in focus

And it's pretty difficult in general

When you really think a person is incredible

And I get it why you're setting em up on a pillar

But the bigger the tumble the bigger the pedestal

Frankly I am flattered

We all want to matter

Do you see when you pass by

That we let the grass die?

I'm late with the rent check

We park on the lawn

Like we're a bunch of fuckin rednecks

I'm just watching netflix

Jerking off to porno

(I have a subscription!)

And I got a suspicion

You think my life is different

I get your confusion

But you got some delusions

Yeah I'm fucking awesome

But I gotta out you

You probably think I'm in there

Writing songs about you (ooooh!)