When The House Is Dark And Quiet

Late at night when Mommy and Daddy have gone out,

Me and my brother get to scream and jump and shout,

'Cause the house is dark and quiet and we're left all alone

With another teen-age baby-sitter talking on the phone.

We tip-toe on our tip-toes and we listen to her laugh,

While the water is running, so she thinks we're in the bath.

She tells her friend she's hungry, so we know just how to tease her;

We go and get the kitty cat and hide it in the freezer.

Cindy opens up the door, you should have seen her leap,

Then we tell her, "That's the place where the kitty always sleeps."

She starts yelling and sends us both to bed,

But Tim and me don't listen to a single thing she's said.

Convinced that Tim and I are finally lying sound asleep,

She settles on the sofa and turns on the TV,

So Tim sneaks to the basement to disconnect the fuse,

While I'm up in the attic, thumping in my father's shoes.

While Cindy checks the TV set, examining the plug,

I crawl across the living room, underneath the rug.

We stand up on the sofa with carrots up our noses,

Pretending we are monsters--not wearing any clothes-es.

Cindy says she won't come back, just like Mike and Sue

Melody and Barbara, John and Linda, too.

Mom and Dad can't leave us now, although they feel they must,

But we can't understand why no one wants to stay with us