The Play

[Mr. Reyes]

Places for scene two!

People, remember: Once puck gives you the pansy serum

You have to really sell that you're transforming into a zombie

Excellent work, ms. Valentine

[Jeremy]

Excellent? But chloe's terrible, she never remembers her-

Mr. Reyes? You can't let anyone drink from that beaker!

[Mr reyes]

Don't be silly! It's more than safe! I should know, I tried it myself

[Squip]

Up, up, down, down, left, right, a

[Jeremy]

I have to get out there!

[Mr reyes]

I can't let you do that, jeremy

[Jeremy]

Mr. Reyes?

[Mr reyes]

You needy, pathetic, self-centered students!

You think I wanted to teach high school drama? In new jersey?

My squip says I can go all the way to broadway!

I just have to keep you from ruining my big night!

[Jeremy]

You're going to squip the whole cast!

[Squip]

That's just for starters!

[Jeremy]

That's not what I wanted!

[Squip]

It's the only way to achieve what you want!

[Jeremy]

I'll fight back! Alcohol messes you up, right? I'll get drunk!

[Squip]

And I'll be back when you're sober!

Unless you plan on staying wasted forever?

[Jeremy]

You're a computer, there has to be a way to turn you off

[Squip]

I'd stop there. You don't want to end up like rich

[Jeremy]

Rich? What did he-?

[Rich, echoed]

I need mountain dew red!

[Jeremy]

That's it! Green mountain dew activates you, red shuts you off!

[Squip]

Why do you think we had it discontinued?

To get rid of me now, you'd need a time machine to the 1990's!

[Jeremy]

Or a friend who's so old-school

He buys 90's soft drinks in the back room at spencer's gifts!

[Squip]

Too bad you don't have one of those

Anymore

[Jeremy]

Michael! Call michael!

[Squip]

I'm going to improve your life, jeremy

If I have to take over the entire student body to do it!

[Michael]

Michael makes an entrance! (haha)

[Jeremy]

Michael!

[Michael]

I was just in the audience, thinking: This is pretty good for a school play!

Then I was like: This is way too good for a school play!

They've all been squipped, right?

[Jeremy]

W-w-wait, you came to see me in the play?

[Michael]

Even brought my own refreshments!

[Ensemble]

Ah ah ah ah ah ah!

[Jeremy]

Is that?!

[Michael]

Mountain dew red!

Told you I did my research!

Oh, hey, jake?

This is gonna sound weird, but if I hold down jeremy

Can you make him drink this mountain dew red?

[Jake]

Actually, that doesn't sound weird at all

[Squip]

Up, up, down, down, left, right, a

[Jake]

Ow!

[Squip]

Ha ha ha

[Jake]

I was already pretty boss before

Now I'm totally boss and then some more!

I'm livin' the upgrade!

[Chloe and brooke]

There you are, jeremy

La la la la la

La la la la la

La la la la la la la la

[Brooke]

I just want you to know I'm not mad

That you broke my heart and then slept with my best friend

[Chloe]

And I'm not mad you dated my best friend and didn't sleep with me

[Brooke]

He didn't sleep with you?

[Chloe]

No

[Brooke]

He didn't sleep with me!

[Chloe]

No!

[Both]

Ohmygod, why was I so jealous of you?

You were jealous of me?

That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me!

Sisters forever! Jinx!

[Michael]

Ugh

[Jeremy]

Michael, the bottle! There's still a few drops left!

[Michael]

How am I supposed to get past them?

[Jeremy]

Apocalypse of the damned! Level nine!

[Both]

The cafetorium!

[Michael]

Got it!

[Both]

Find the bad guy, push 'em aside

Then move on forward with your friend at your side!

It's a two player game, so when they make an attack

You know you got a brother gonna have your back!

Then you stay on track and- ah!- remain on course

And if they give you a smack you- gah!- you use your force

And if you leave your brother behind that's lame

'Cause it's an effed up world but it's a two player game!

Hey!

[Jenna roland]

I know what you're doing, michael

I know what everyone's doing! All the time!

[The cast of the play]

I just feel soooo connected to you guys right now!

[Squip]

Ah! You don't want to drink that, jeremy!

[Jeremy]

Why not?

[Squip]

Because then you'll never be with her!

[Christine]

You are the person I want to be with every day

And this is something that I've been afraid to say

[Jeremy]

That is not christine

[Squip]

I assure you, it is!

Only her fears and her insecurities have been removed!

[Christine + ensemble]

You're the guy I am so kinda into (into)

The guy I am totally into (into)

This feeling is new

Jeremy

I love you

[Squip]

That's your cue!

[Jeremy]

She'll do whatever I want!

[Squip]

That's what I promised!

[Jeremy]

Great. Drink this

[Squip]

Wait-

[Christine]

Ah!

[All]

Ah!

[Squip]

Jeremy!

J-je-jeremy?

Jere-re

Ah

Woah

Ah

Woah

Ah

Woah

Woah!

Jeremy!

Jere-

Ah!