The Crusher

Now I wanna wrestle in the garden

I'm on my way to stardom

I know I'm ready, I know I'm great

But first I got to get in shape

Gotta get myself to the gym

And start workin'

Start lifting those weights in the air

Gonna be a bad guy and fight unfair

I've got my eyes on the Russian Bear

Gonna tear him up, I swear

This guy thinks he's the champion

Gonna take his belt and gonna beat him!

I'm the crusher, king of the ring

I'm the crusher, king of the ring

I'm ready for a match with the Russian Bear

Gonna pile, drive him and pull his hair

I might have a foreign object in my trunks

I might have to use on that punk

If he starts singin' the Russian Anthem

I'm gonna jump him

Before the bell rings

'Cause people are cheering for Dee Dee King

Got the hardest hold you can put on anyone

If you're my victim you're beaten

I'm a lean, mean fightin' machine

Powerful and strong like King Kong

I'm the crusher, king of the ring

I'm the crusher, king of the ring

Started having second thought as soon I was scared as hell

The last thing I wanted was to hear them ring the bell

I mean the Russian Bear could

Probably tear me limb from limb

He'd probably grin be real happy with himself

This is not good for my health

I'm not coming out of the dressing room

And get beaten up by that goon

Go back to Russia, go back home!

Don't wanna get a broken bone

Or a lump on my head

Ain't gonna hide under the bed

I'm the crusher, king of the ring

I'm the crusher, king of the ring

I'm the crusher, king of the ring

I'm the crusher, king of the ring

Got butterflies and a headache

My knees are shaking, I've turned to creamcake

I mean the Russian Bear is 7'3

And the look in his face, is really crazy

How did I get myself into this jam?

I was much better off singin': Funky Man

Got this nutty idea, in my head

Thank God I'm wearing Keds

'Cause they are my running shoes

And if I fight this match I know I'll lose

I'll melt like an ice cube in the Sun

Now I'm done with wrestling

I'm the crusher, king of the ring

I'm the crusher, king of the ring

I'm the crusher, king of the ring

I'm the crusher, king of the ring

I'm the crusher

I'm the crusher

I'm the crusher

I'm the crusher

I'm the crusher