What do We do It For?

N y woman

Somewhere there are birds

Singing sweet lovely songs

And a guy tells a girl

In her arms he belongs

People say you’ll find the one

If you just look, we guarantee

Well I’ve looked and looked and looked and looked

But there’s no one for me

N y man

Don’t I know it.

I’ve searched this whole island

Queens and brooklyn, even hoboken

But for some of us

Our only true guarantee

Is that our hearts get broken

N y woman

Jersey?

N y man

I got on the wrong train.

Back in the first grade,

I knew this girl.

There was some magic in the notes that we passed

One day, while playin’ in the sand

I made a move to hold her hand.

She said ‘I think that things are movin’ too fast.’

Diana

Huh. Tease.

N y man

Yeah.

N y woman

One time in high school,

I had a crush.

So I thought I’d ask him out to the prom.

But he said, ‘you know what honey?

Though you’re charming and you’re funny,

I love you the way a boy loves his mom.’

Marcy

That’s not good

Ensemble

Oh, why do we do it?

Continue to pursue it?

When it ends up hurting us to the core?

N y woman

It’s because,

Though it sounds corny,

You feel love,

N y man

Or you feel horny.

Ensemble

What do we do it for?

Marcy

At least it got better when we got older

N y woman and diana

Right.

N y man

Yeah right.

I had this good friend

That I loved for years

One day I thought the situation must end

So I said, ‘I love you truly,’

And she responded coolly,

‘Oh, I love you too, but just as a friend.’

Diana

Don’t be friends.

N y woman

I met this great guy

Right here at this bar.

And we talked and talked and talked about life

And he said, ‘my god, you’re pretty,

And you’re interesting, and you’re witty.

You know you remind me a lot of my wife.’

N y man

Sing it girls!

Ensemble

Why do we do it?

There must be something to it.

That keeps us coming right back for more.

Marcy

This thing love,

It keeps me guessing

Diana

This is getting damn depressing

Ensemble

What do we do it for?

N y woman

We try and try and try and try.

It’s as if the gods up in the sky hate us.

Diana

Sing child

N y man

It’s now so bad that I

Am going on a dating hiatus.

N y woman

Oh, I hear you.

I think there is a curse,

Marcy

You know, I’m certain of it because

Diana

Testify

N y woman

Just when it can’t get worse-

Look at here

Diana

Fuck me

Ensemble

It does!

N y man

I’ll just wait here alone at this bar

With each drink,

It’s more depressing and sad.

N y woman

Maybe I should give up dating

‘Cause I feel like I’m just waiting

For a guy to say,

‘You look like my dad.’

Ensemble

Oh…

We keep at it,

Even though we’ve had it,

And the signs are getting hard to ignore.

Marcy

They’re all saying

‘Haha, got you.

Diana

Love’s for people

Who are not you.’

Ensemble

What do we do it for?

N y man

Alright. You ladies want another round?

(Sure)

Okay. We’ll just take it out of her tips.

Yes, but then again,

You just never know.

In a moment he might walk through that door.

Marcy

And he’d stop my heart from sinking

Diana

And my head from over-thinking.

Ensemble

That’s what we do it for.

That’s why we do it,

Why we put our poor selves through it.

That’s what we do it

For…

Diana

Marcy, let’s go.