Page type: lyric reference
Artist: Key of Awesome
Canonical path: /key-of-awesome/emo-vampire
Related lyric paths: 6
Lyric guide
Emo Vampire
Read Emo Vampire lyrics by Key of Awesome on LyroVerse, with linked artist context and related song paths.
person
Curated by Ethan Walker
LyroVerse team
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Lyrics
Emo Vampire
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- Wolves. Children of the night.
- How old are you?
- I have crossed oceans just to see you.
- Your breath smells like dirt.
I'll never be an emo vampire
Setting tweenaged loins on fire
I've got nothing in common with the vampires of today
They gaze at girls and pout and brood and then just run away
This Twilight hack thinks she can come along and change the Vampire rules
I guess sleeping in coffins and wearing capes, suddenly isn't cool
Girls won't climb up trees with me or canoodle in the grass
And when I play Vampire baseball I always get picked last
- Oh, c'mon. Seriously dudes. That's a human you just picked over me.
I've seduced all kinds of women from all over the world
But, now the only dates I get are with chunky gothic girls
When did all these Vampires become abstinent and whiny
When I walk out into the sun I don't get all bright and shiny
Vampires don't have purity rings like undead Jonas Brothers
If I can't score with these high school girls, perhaps I'll go for their mothers
- Why not? When you're 600 years old there's no such thing as a cougar.
I'll never be an emo vampire
Setting tweenaged loins on fire
I'll have no participation
In this vampire pussification
So wake me up when the world grows a pair... Of fangs
- You thought I was going to say balls did'nt you?
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Who performs "Emo Vampire"?
Key of Awesome performs "Emo Vampire", and this lyric page sits inside the Key of Awesome catalog on LyroVerse.
Are there related songs to explore after "Emo Vampire"?
Yes. The related section below points to Adele Parody (feat. Angry Birds) and California Gurls with a short reason for opening each page next.
Where can I find more songs by Key of Awesome?
Use the artist link near the top of the page or the related paths section below to keep moving through Key of Awesome's lyric pages.
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