Heathers: The Musical Mashup

Dear diary, September 1st, 1989

But I know, I know, I know, life can be beautiful

I pray, I pray, for a better way

We were kind before

We can be kind once more

We can be beautiful

If you lack the balls, you can go play dolls

Let your mommy fix you a snack

Wooh, oh, oh

Or you could come smoke

Pound some rum and coke

In my Porsche with the quarter back

Woh, oh, oh, woh, oh, woh, oh

Honey, what'cha waiting for?

Step into my Candy Store!

Time for you to prove you're not a loser anymore!

And step into my Candy Store

Would you hold my hand?

And would you carry me through No Man's Land?

It's fine, if you don't agree

But I would fight for you, if you would fight for me

I've been through ten Highschools

They start to get blurry

No point planting roots

'Cause you're gone in a hurry

My dad keeps two suitcases packed in the den

So it's only a matter of when

Freeze your brain!

Shatter your skull, fight pain with more pain

When the voice in your head says you're better off dead

Don't open a vein

Dad says act our age

You heard the man, it's time to rage!

(Crank the bass, turn out the light, ain't nobody home tonight!)

Drink, smoke, it's all cool

Let's get wasted in my pool!

(Fill that joint and roll it tight, ain't nobody home tonight!)

The demon queen of Highschool has decreed it

She says Monday, eight AM, I will be deleted

She'll hunt me down in study hall

Stuff and mount me on the wall

Thirty hours to live, how shall I spend them?

I need it hard, I'm a dead girl walking!

I'm in your yard, I'm a dead girl walking

Before they punch my clock

I'm snapping off your window lock

Got no time to knock

I'm a dead girl walking

No one thinks a pretty girl has feelings

That's the curse of popularity

(Popularity)

I am more than shoulder pads and makeup!

No one sees the me inside of-

You make my balls so blue

They're hanging sadly

You make my balls so blue

You hurt them badly

What did they do to you?

For you to hurt them so?

Hide from me

They're all beat up like a tacking dummy!

I worship you

I'd trade my life for yours

We'll watch them dissapear

And plant our garden here

(We'll plant our garden here!)

Our love is God!

Our love is God!

They were not dirty!

(Oh, no)

They were not wrong

(Not wrong!)

They were just two stray verses, in the Lord's great song!

My boys are homosexuals, and that don't scare me none

I want the world to know

I love my dead gay-

Fine, we're damaged

Badly damaged

But that does not make us wise!

We're not special

We're not different

We don't choose who lives or dies!

Let's be normal

See bad movies

Sneak a beer, and watch TV

We'll bake brownies

Or go bowling

Don't you want a life with me?

Can't we be seventeen?

Is that so hard to do?

If you could let me in

I could be good with you

Deep inside of everyone, there's a hot ball of shame

Guilt, regret, anxiety

Fears we dare not name

But If we show the ugly parts

That we hide away

They turn out to be beautiful, by the light of day!

Why not shine, shine, shine a light?

On your deepest fears!

(Let it sunlight, night)

And your pain will disappear!

I'm hugging my knees, and the captain is pointing

Well, who made her captain!

Still, the weakest must go

The tiniest lifeboat

Full of people I know

Ooh, ooh

There was a boy I knew in Kindergarten

He was good at sports, said that I was smart

He was sweet and all the people liked him

And at nap time, once, we shared a mat

He, yo, Westerberg

Tell me what's that sound?

Here comes Westerberg

Comin' to put you in the ground!

He, yo, Westerberg

Tell me what's that sound?

Westerberg will knock you out

And send you straight to hell!

You dropped me out like I was trash

For that I should be dead

But! But! But!

Then it hit me like a flash

What if Highschool went away instead?

Those assholes are the key!

They're keeping you away from me!

They made you blind, messed up your mind

But I can set you free

I was meant to be yours

We were meant to be one

(Oh, my God!)

I can't do this alone!

(Not this way!)

We must finish what we begun

I wanted someone strong who would protect me

I let his anger fester, and infect me

His solution is a lie

No one here deserves to die!

Except for me

And the monster I created

Yeah, yeah!

I am damaged, far too damaged

But you're not beyond repair

Stick around here, make things better

'Cause you beat me fair and square

Please stand back now

Little further

Don't know what thing will do

Hope you'd miss me

Wish you'd kiss me

Then you'd know I worship you

Would you let me be your friend?

(My friend?)

We can be seventeen

We can learn how to chill

If no one loves me now, someday somebody will!

We'll make it beautiful

Beautiful, beautiful

Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful!