Vanity

One thing that I do is try to control everything inside my life

It never works, look at the trouble that it brings

Look at the pain that I have caused all this destruction wasn't worth it

Look at all that I created, I don't know my greater purpose

I ain't mad at anyone 'cause I'm the reason it ain't working

Yeah, it took a couple years for me to learn that we ain't perfect

Had to, lose all my family

And most of my sanity

Can't fit in humanity

Damn I lost all my clarity

It's actually amazing I've made it as far as this

Thought that I would feel completed after all of these hits

But I'm in my room, just clenching my fists and losing my grip

It was all about the passion now it's money and spliffs

So who got this, who got that

Judging value with gifts

I had a crew, where they at

Many people have split

Maybe it's normal to grow up and slowly distance apart

But I'm not good at saying bye from ones I loved at the start

I find some comfort knowing that we both look up at the stars

I had to let go of the hate 'cause it was killing my heart

My grandfather died of cancer, wonder how I'll depart

I think about it way too much, so I'm afraid of the dark

In the same moment, I can see all of this beauty in front of me

Feeling grateful that I even have you all in my company

If enough ends up being the last record I make

Carry it knowing that I gave it all I had in this place

I've seen a lot that I don't speak of I pretend it don't exist

Checking boxes that don't matter on a fabricated list

Why you asking where I been my answers I been building this

I was drowning in emotion, so I had to build a ship

I'll be thirty in a year or two

Seeking out a clearer view

But every day that's passing by, I feel like death is nearing too

Like hey, haven't seen you in a minute you look older now

I'm still the person that I was, I'm just a little colder now

Preacher looking at me, I don't think he wants to mess with this

Christians saying one thing, but that goes against the Methodists

Searching what the method is

I know it's not a pessimist

Just respect a human as a human and don't question it

That's a universal law that's been written in stone

But we carry negativity that started in our homes

If this reaches you in time, I'm asking what you plan to be

And what you see when you get stripped away of all your vanity