Salvation Barmy

[girl's voice]

I am a pretty little dutch girl

As pretty as pretty can be

And all the boys around my block

Are crazy over me

[Paul Barman]

I was walkin down the street, lookin at boobs, asses, faces

Went in the salvation army for some used glasses cases

Next to the doooorway

The cashier catch me, held up an old map of Norway

She flipped it over, and the message read 'You're gay'

I looked at her anxiously

Two lip rings looked like fangs to me

I said, "Hope my sperm will get under your thermal

Underwear, because you're cuter than Nermal"

She said, "Go get a haircut"

So I showed her my bare butt

Pulled down my car hearts put my moon in her star-charts

And to make stupid stupider, I stuffed the ring up my ass

Said, "Now my moon's Jupiter"

FUCKIN ASSHOLE

[guy's voice]

She has a boyfriend Fatty

He comes from Cincinnati

With 48 toes and a pickle on his nose

And this is the way the story goes

[Paul Barman]

Clickity clack, he's at the rack with the jackets

It's Black Italiano, lookin black cuz he's backlit

"Ay, what's up with these fuckin Chinese lookin street gang jackets?"

We started to slowdance

I said, "No chance for romance

If I have to wear condoms cuz they feel like snow pants"

But I couldn't stay calm, because she revealed a bra

Made of two yamakas, I said, "You're hella great!"

Let's celebrate!

We took the freight elevate-

Er to continue our back-and-forth shaggin sports

In the room with the davenports where men become cuckolds

She chuckled

I felt her knuckle above my belt buckle

[guy's voice]

One day when she was walking

She heard her boyfriend talking

To a little girl with a strawberry curl

And this is what he said to her

[Paul Barman]

My pissed off Jabrowski

Turned three colors like Christov Krislowski

And said, "A handjob's a man's job, your job's a blowjob"

That porn snob

That corn cob with a doorknob is a born slob ?????

Every penis wants to be famous

It's a good way to stay misogynistic and aimless

She said, "I'm glad you explained that

My name is Jane Pratt, before you jerk off on my head please pass me that rain hat"

So I did, you know

What can I say?

I'm a lonely male who will settle for any phony in a ponytail

[another guy's voice]

Come On

Bring your woman over here so I can show her a real Italian man

I got the best of both fuckin worlds here

Fuckin black man's dick, and an Italian man's brain

Hehehee, FUCKIN ASSHOLE