Page type: lyric reference
Artist: Monty Python
Canonical path: /monty-python/medical-love-song
Related lyric paths: 6
Video embedded: yes
Lyric guide
Medical Love Song
Read Medical Love Song lyrics by Monty Python on LyroVerse, with linked artist context and related song paths.
person
Curated by Ethan Walker
LyroVerse team
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Lyrics
Medical Love Song
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Inflammation of the foreskin
Reminds me of your smile
I've had balanital chancroids
For quite a little while
I gave my heart to NSU [Non-Specific Urethritis]
That lovely night in June
I ache for you, my darling,
And I hope you'll get well soon
My penile warts, your herpes,
My syphilitic sore,
Your monilial infection
How I miss you more and more
Your dobies itch my scrum-pox
Ah, lovely gonorrhea
At least we both were lying
When we said that we were clear
Our syphilitic kisses
Sealed the secret of our tryst
You gave me scrotal pustules
With a quick flick of your wrist
Your trichovaginitis
Sent shivers down my spine
I got snail tracks in my anus
When your spirochetes met mine
Gonococcal urethritis
Streptococcal balanitis
Meningomyelitis
Diplococcal catholitis
Epidydimitis
Interstitial keratitis
Syphilitic coronitis
And anterior ureitis.
My clapped-out genitalia
Is not so bad for me
As the complete and utter failure
Every time I try to pee
My doctor says my buboes
Are the worst he's ever seen
My scrotum's painted orange
And my balls are turning green
My heart is very tender
Though my parts are awful raw
You might have been infected
But you never were a bore
I'm dying from your love, my love
I'm your spirochætal clown
I've left my body to science
But I'm afraid they've turned it down.
Gonococcal urethritis
Streptococcal balanitis
Meningomyelitis
Diplococcal catholitis
Epidydimitis
Interstitial keratitis
Syphilitic coronitis
And anterior ureitis.
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Who performs "Medical Love Song"?
Monty Python performs "Medical Love Song", and this lyric page sits inside the Monty Python catalog on LyroVerse.
Are there related songs to explore after "Medical Love Song"?
Yes. The related section below points to All For One and Decomposing Composers with a short reason for opening each page next.
Where can I find more songs by Monty Python?
Use the artist link near the top of the page or the related paths section below to keep moving through Monty Python's lyric pages.
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