Girl For Me

Andrew: Oh hey Adam, what are you doing?

Adam:Oh hey Andrew, I was just about to sing a song about my number one girl.

Andrew: Oh yeh? Mind if I join you?

Adam: Not at all, good buddy. Let's do it

Andrew: Alright.

Adam: I can cook you dinner,

And be by your side,

Bathe in the moonlight,

Get lost in your eyes,

Andrew: I'll run my hands through your hair

As I caress your face

We can cuddle all night

And watch Will and Grace

Together: 'Cos she's the girl for me

Adam: Man those chicks really like that show

Andrew: Among others...

Adam: What do you mean?

Andrew: Uh nothing

Adam: OK

Adam: I'll bring flowers to your doorstep

When we go out on dates

We can lay on the beach

And I'll hand-feed you grapes

Andrew: I can unwrap your package

And you'll unwrap mine

And I'll kiss your neck

As I do you from behind

Together: 'Cos she's the girl for me

Adam: Uh, Andrew, what did you mean by unwrapping the other package?

Andrew: You know, like presents and exchanging gifts and stuff like that.

Adam: Oh, and why would you do it from behind?

Andrew: You never heard of doggy style? Girls really like that.

Adam: Oh OK. I thought you were saying gay things.

Andrew: No. You know me better than that.

Adam: Yeah, you're right, I'm sorry.

Adam: I want you to say,

You'll always be with me,

I'll give you a backrub,

Write you poetry

Andrew: I can give you a Hummer,

We can look for shoe sales,

Then dance to the Village People

And go to Chippendales

Together: 'Cos she's the girl for me

Adam: OK That was definitely gay

Andrew: What the hell are you talking about?

Adam: You know what a Hummer is, don't you? It's a blow job.

Andrew: No it isn't. It just means oral sex. It can be used for both sexes.

Adam: Are you sure? Cos I'm pretty sure it's referring to pleasuring the male...

Andrew: Adam, trust me.

Adam: Well then why the hell would you go to Chippendales?

Andrew: What? You took your girlfriend to Centrefold, what's the difference?

Adam: I don't know, there just is.

Andrew: Well, I'm comfortable with my sexuality. If my girl wants to go see men strip, I wanna be there to support her. I'm sorry if you're too immature and insecure in your own sexuality to understand it.

Adam: Well, since when have you danced to the Village People?

Andrew: Oh, come on Adam. They play their stuff everywhere. Is everyone who dances to the Village People gay?

Adam: No, I guess not.

Andrew: You know what Adam? I think you're obsessed with gay people.

Adam: No I'm not obsessed with homosexuals. Look, I'm sorry. I don't know what's gotten into me. Let's just continue with the song. I swear I won't jump to anymore conclusions.

Andrew: Alright

Adam: I'll try my best

To be the man of your dreams

Stay with you through hard times

No matter how bad they seem

Andrew: I'll kiss your Adam's Apple

Put your balls in my mouth

And give you a hand job

Before I go south

You being a chick

Won't make me happy

Pound my ass

Pull out and cock-slap me

'Cos that's the guy for me

I like dudes

Andrew: ... What?

Adam: What do you mean 'What?' That wasn't even inuendo. You're just talking about gay business.

Andrew: Adam, you promised you wouldn't jump to conclusions.

Adam: Jump to conclusions? How's a girl gonna pound your ass and cock-slap you?

Andrew: ... She could be wearing a strap-on

Adam: What?!? You explicitly said you like dudes and chicks don't make you happy.

Andrew: You're taking that way out of context.

Adam: Come on, you are gay. Just admit it. You like doing men.

Andrew: I swear I don't.

Adam: Andrew, seriously, you are gay.

Andrew: ... Alright, maybe I am.

Adam: OK.

Andrew: OK. So. What do you wanna do now?

Adam: Um. You wanna come over to my place?

Andrew: Yeah alright.

Adam: OK