Left Behind

Don't take me back to the old version of me

When I didn't even give a single fuck

About anyone or anything

And it's no wonder I'm still so fucking lonely

After all the years I spent with this dread

Destroyed by these thoughts in my head

When will I manage to push away

All those who cared for me

Just a slave to my hypocrisy

It's like I'm stuck

Held down by my own ways

Remembering all the pain

That I've been forced to put on display

And maybe it's just too much

A fear I no longer can ignore

I just thought there would be more

But just know

It terrifies me deep inside my bones

Because this lonely life

Is the hardest truth I have ever known

So medicate, alleviate

I can't escape from the shadow I've become

Because this crushing weight upon my shoulders

Has left me undone

And I swear that I just want to be better

But sometimes everything spirals out of control

And it's just something

I've never once believed in

Giving up a part of my fucking soul

I never said that I was perfect

But I've been convinced

That I am just worthless

What have I become?

And all these passing lights

Keep trying to guide me home

But all I can see is loss

It's all I've ever known

But just know

It terrifies me deep inside my bones

Because this lonely life

Is the hardest truth I have ever known

So medicate, alleviate

I can't escape from the shadow I've become

Because this crushing weight upon my shoulders

Has left me undone

It's like I'm stuck

Held down by my own ways

Left behind

Nothing left to save of me