Page type: lyric reference
Artist: The Beards
Canonical path: /the-beards/if-your-dad-doesn-t-have-a-beard-you-ve-got-two-mums
Related lyric paths: 6
Video embedded: yes
Lyric guide
If Your Dad Doesn't Have A Beard, You've Got Two Mums
Read If Your Dad Doesn't Have A Beard, You've Got Two Mums lyrics by The Beards on LyroVerse, with linked artist context and related song paths.
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Curated by Ethan Walker
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Lyrics
If Your Dad Doesn't Have A Beard, You've Got Two Mums
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Remember when you were 14
Your dad taught you to shave
That wasn't a very fatherly way
For him to behave
You had to watch your first beard
Melting down the drain
A beard abandoned
A son betrayed
Your dad taught you how
And look at you now
'Cos if your dad doesn't have a beard
You've got two mums
Two beardless mums
If your dad doesn't have a beard
You've got two mums
Two beardless mums
Remember how he watched
Your face lathered with cream
The mirror fogging over
As the bathroom filled with steam
He put the razor in your hand
And said now let's begin
Shave with short quick strokes my son
And head towards the chin
Ooh!
Oh, you've got two bearless mums, yeah
You know I can't stand to see a child
Put through that much pain when he knows
That he'll never see his first beard again
And you know that there is
No greater crime against the human race
Than when a father takes a razor to his own son's face
Ow
Your dad taught you how
You're just like him now
'Cos if your dad doesn't have a beard (dad doesn't have a beard)
You've got two mums
Two beardless mums (beardless mums)
Oh if your dad doesn't have a beard (dad doesn't have a beard)
You've got two stupid-looking beardless fucking mums
Two beardless mums, yeah
Two beardless mums, all right!
Two beardless mums (two beardless mums)
Two beardless mums, woo!
Two beardless mums
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Who performs "If Your Dad Doesn't Have A Beard, You've Got Two Mums"?
The Beards performs "If Your Dad Doesn't Have A Beard, You've Got Two Mums", and this lyric page sits inside the The Beards catalog on LyroVerse.
Are there related songs to explore after "If Your Dad Doesn't Have A Beard, You've Got Two Mums"?
Yes. The related section below points to Beards Are Back and A Bit Of My Beard with a short reason for opening each page next.
Where can I find more songs by The Beards?
Use the artist link near the top of the page or the related paths section below to keep moving through The Beards's lyric pages.
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